death

Jun

2021

A suffering woman and a dead girl

Jesus is our Hope when Problems are Unsolvable

[Readings for the 5th Sunday after Pentecost: Lamentations 3:22-33, Psalm 30, 2 Corinthians 8:7-15, Mark 5:21-43]

Chances are, a number of you currently are experiencing or recently have experienced a loss, a hardship, some source of pain in your life. Just in terms of those who’ve lost a loved one, statistics say there are people reading this blog post dealing with that form of grief. “About 2½ million people die in the United States annually, each leaving an average of five grieving people behind” (The Recovery Village: Grief by the Numbers). In 2020, that number of deaths in the US was estimated at over 3½ million by the CDC’s National Vital Statistics System–the death toll expanded greatly due to COVID. An Associated Press poll conducted in March of this year found that 20% of people in the United States had lost a friend or close relative to COVID. “That means a potential bereaved population of about 65 million.” A psychiatrist at Columbia University warns that because of isolation due to the pandemic, a significant percentage of the bereaved could experience prolonged grief disorder, a condition of persistent grief that lasts longer and aches more deeply than the typical grieving process. Some studies have shown more than triple the typical rate of prolonged grief disorder have been occurring over this past year. (See “COVID Has Put the World at Risk of Prolonged Grief Disorder,” by Katherine Harmon Courage, May 19, 2021, in Scientific American.)

Those are some general truths, some national and international statistics. More than likely, some of you reading this are grieving over a loss, some are struggling with persistent pain, all know community members whose lives are hurting.

“Encounter” by Daniel Cariola, Magdala Chapel – https://www.magdala.org/

The Gospel account for this Sunday (Mark 5:21-43), from the days of Jesus’ ministry in Galilee, shows powerful examples of persons dealing with grief and trauma … and their dependence on Jesus as their only hope. First there is the case of Jairus’ daughter, a young girl who should not become deathly ill, but who was deathly ill. Then, even as Jesus was on his way to Jairus’ home, the girl died. That did not stop Jesus from his desire or ability to help. We’ll say more about that momentarily. Meanwhile, Jesus was the only answer for a woman whose problem just would not go away, and she was at the end of her rope. She had been suffering for twelve years with “an issue of blood,” as the King James Version put it. Our translation says “hemorrhaging.” Modern scholars, assessing what may have afflicted her, deduce it was menorrhagia — “abnormally heavy and long menstruation that causes enough cramping and blood loss … that it makes normal daily activities impossible” (Nigerian Biomedical Science Journal, August 29, 2017). We feel anguish for that woman, experiencing such a condition for twelve years. Now think also of the social stigma that it placed on her in her culture. Jewish cultural norms, following the laws of Moses, stipulated that anyone with a bodily discharge (bleeding or secretion) was considered “unclean” and was to stay socially distanced till after the bleeding or discharge stopped. It was a religious rule but also something of a public health rule for the Jewish people back before anyone knew much about bloodborne pathogens protocols. So, on top of a chronic, frightening health problem, this poor woman was supposed to remain in something like COVID-19 lockdown when the community around her was not in lockdown. Think of the isolation and abandonment and frustration she must have felt. She seems to have been a woman of some means, and had spent every penny she had going to various doctors, trying to find a cure for her problem. But none of them could help her. Her condition only got worse. Coming to see Jesus was an act of desperation, her last hope. She’d heard about Jesus. She’d heard he could do miracles. So she violated the social distancing policies that prohibited her from going out into a crowded space. She made her way through the throngs of people following Jesus, hoping just to get close enough, thinking, “If I but touch his clothes, I will be made well” (Mark 5:28).

Indeed, the woman was made well from the moment she came in contact with Jesus. But Jesus did not want her to remain in hiding (or to hide from him). He stopped the crowd. He took note of the woman, who was afraid and confessed what she had done–which actually was a confession of faith. Jesus commended her and promised his ongoing presence with her. “Daughter, your faith has made you well; go in peace, and be healed of your disease,” Jesus said (Mark 5:34). Think a bit about the context too. Jesus was on his way to the home of a high-ranking person, Jairus, who was a leader of the local synagogue. And Jairus had a significant need for Jesus’ attention; his daughter was deathly ill. But Jesus paused to pay attention to the woman who just wanted a quick, incognito encounter and nothing more. She was like a person who comes to a church hoping against hope for something, sitting in the back row, not wanting to be noticed, but the Lord wants her to be noticed and wants people to care about her. No matter how insignificant we feel we are, no matter how ostracized or shoved aside by society, no matter how helpless we think our situation is, Jesus wants us to know we are welcome in his presence, that we are worthy of care and attention.

Gabriel von Max, “The Raising of Jairus Daughter” (1878) – Wikimedia Commons

And Jesus will care about us even when our situation is more dire than twelve years of incessant bleeding. For example, when a twelve-year old girl is dying–and even when she dies–Jesus does not turn away from helping. To everybody else in the situation with Jairus’ daughter, her death was the end of the story. People came from the family’s house to say Jesus need not be bothered anymore, because the girl was dead. When Jesus came to the house anyway and told the mourners the girl was only sleeping and he would wake her, they all laughed at him. But we see the ultimate power of Jesus and the reason he had come to be with us on this earth. Death is the ultimate problem that plagues us as human beings. The sicknesses we have point to our mortality, to the eventuality that we all die. The death of a child points out the cold reality of death in a particularly harsh way. But the shocking finality of death is the very reason Jesus became incarnate as a human being, to reverse that curse. As Scripture says, Jesus came down to our level “so that by the grace of God he might taste death for everyone.” Since we are beings of flesh and blood, he “shared the same things, so that through death he might destroy the one who has the power of death, that is, the devil, and free those who all their lives were held in slavery by the fear of death” (Hebrews 2:9,14,15). Jesus’ actions healing the suffering woman and raising the dead girl are evidence of the healing and salvation he came to bring to all of us.

Maybe the problems you experience in your life aren’t exactly like the cases we looked at today, a woman hemorrhaging blood for twelve years, a family mourning the death of a child. Their experiences are examples within the range of so much human suffering that occurs. So many people experience deep hurts of so many kinds. In my years in the church, I’ve known …

dear souls who bore the scars of childhood sexual abuse for years and years in their adult lives …
dear souls who struggled with addiction …
dear souls who lost their jobs and struggled to maintain self-respect …
dear souls who experienced excruciating pain from terminal diseases …
dear souls who lost loved ones in senseless ways — in a car accident that occured on the way home from attending a funeral, or in a plane crash that occurred while attempting a stunt for a military air show.

In the work I’m doing now in human services, I encounter persons …

who need skilled nursing care and hospice care …
who need mental health hospitalization …
who have all manner of disabilities and need ongoing care and supports …
who are challenged by poverty and have little or no resources ….

So, while I don’t know exactly what you’re going through in your lives right now, chances are, there are losses, hardships, and no shortage of sources of pain. Maybe you feel like your soul has been bleeding for years and you don’t know how to make it stop. Where do you turn when the hurt in your life is constant, when the aches of your heart never really go away? Maybe you’ve tried everything–self-help books, practicing self-care, seeking professional help, any kind of help from anywhere and everywhere. And some things help some, but nothing is a complete cure. Only the hope we have for resurrection in Jesus can keep us going through the pains and losses and devastations that are so much a part of life on this earth. Jesus is our hope when our problems are otherwise unsolvable. Like the woman pressing through the crowd for even just a touch of the hem of his garment, we reach out to Jesus as our only eternal source of hope.

And how does that work–to reach out to be touched by Jesus when Jesus isn’t physically walking through the streets of your town? Certainly one way is in coming to church, where you gather to hear Jesus’ words and receive his touch through the sacraments. There’s another way, too, that I’d like to say a little something about before concluding this message. I’d like you to think about today’s Epistle lesson also (2 Corinthians 8:7-15), which maybe seemed to go in a different direction than the other readings of the day. Paul wrote to the Christians at Corinth: “As you excel in everything—in faith, in speech, in knowledge, in utmost eagerness, and in your love for us—so we want you to excel also in this generous undertaking” (2 Corinthians 8:7). The generous undertaking going on at that time was a special gathering of financial support for Christians elsewhere, particularly in the regions of Judea and Syria, who were experiencing food shortages and famine conditions. Actually, the original statement in Paul’s letter simply says, “We want you to excel also in this grace” — the Greek word charis (from which we get our English word “charity”). It’s somewhat limiting that in English we use the word “charity” (charis) mostly in terms of financial gifts. Scripture uses the same word not just for gifts of financial support but for the ultimate grace, God’s gift of his Son Jesus, the One and Only, to be our rescuer. Jesus now calls us to be gifts of grace to each other–with financial contributions, yes, but more than financial contributions. We become embodiments of Jesus to one another in our times of need.

At a church I was associated with in Texas some years ago, the congregation was in a bit of a financial crisis. A series of cottage meetings were planned, gathering members together in small groups at host members’ homes, to talk about how to address the financial crisis. At the first of those meetings, before getting to the stewardship agenda for the evening, there was an icebreaker activity planned, just to get people talking. Each person could respond to a prompt on the icebreaker card, which had prompts such as, “The most embarrassing moment in my life was ___________” … “One of my favorite vacations was _____” … “Something I’m praying about right now is ______,” and others. The first person at that first meeting started the conversation circle, choosing, “Something I’m praying about right now” and saying, “I’m praying for my daughter, who was just diagnosed with cancer.” There followed many minutes of fellow members showing concern for the woman, for her daughter, for her daughter’s husband and children, and actually engaging in prayer right there as a prayer circle. The next person in the circle then also chose to share something heavy on her heart, something she was praying about, and the members listened to her hurt and ministered to her as well. For over two hours that evening, the members shared their needs, consoled one another, prayed for one another. They never did get to the planned agenda about the church’s financial situation, and that was okay. They did what was important. The other cottage meetings that occurred in the days and weeks after that first one all followed the same pattern. The gathered members all focused on the prompt about what was heavy on their hearts, what they were praying about, and they acted as missionaries of gospel to one another, encouraging each other. Oh, and by the way, the church’s financial situation turned around too–because for the first time in a long time the members of the congregation began to realize the value of their ministry to one another and to others and, like Paul said, they began to excel also in that grace and in the generous undertaking of gifts to support needed ministry.

In the midst of famine and hunger, in the midst of grief and abandonment, in the midst of sickness and death, in the midst of all this world’s problems and pains, Jesus is our hope. And as brothers and sisters to one another in Jesus, we become miracles of grace and hope to one another as well.

Brothers and sisters, may Christ be with you as you endure whatever hurts or sorrows are happening in your life today and whatever troubles you may face in days to come. And may you be with one another in Christ, supporting each other, praying for one another, reminding each other of the gospel hope we share. We know our Redeemer lives, and that he will be with us when we are on our deathbeds, and that at the end, he will stand upon our graves, and that even after our skin has been destroyed, we will yet see God, we will be raised by Christ to be with Christ forever. How our hearts yearn within us! (Cf. Job 19:25-27.) Amen.

—

Scripture quotations are from the New Revised Standard Version Bible, copyright © 1989 National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Jun

2021

Treasured companions

The blessing of animals

Rabbits have taken up residence in our gardens. I don’t mind. Yes, they eat the tender tops off some of the plants … but we protect the ones we want to protect, and we can share the others. On occasions, deer have treated themselves to hostas and lilies in our yard, and that’s okay too. Visits from wildlife are joyful intrusions into our residential space. Well … not all wildlife. Even Saint Francis of Assisi (1181-1226), famous for his warm regard for all creatures, regarded mice and vermin as “agents of the devil.”[1] I tend to agree on that point.

There are lots of tales told about Saint Francis, everything from preaching sermons to flocks of birds to calming and taming a ravenous wolf. Those stories have the ring of legend to them, fabrications to further Francis’ fame. What appears to be genuinely historical, though, is that Francis had a strong affinity with nature and animals, that seeing animals suffer upset him deeply, and that “the beauty in nature and the animal world should lead to worship and praise of God” (Samuel Gregg, Acton Institute blog, October 4, 2019).

The animals that are closest to us–as pets in our homes–especially give us reasons to thank God for their companionship. We rightly treat them “just as if they were members of the household” – so said even someone as stalwart as the moral philosopher Immanuel Kant (1724-1804).[2]

We lost a precious animal friend in our household recently. His personality was always that of a puppy, even when he was past ten years old. But then he fell ill, and it hurt to see him hurt. When all the efforts at veterinary intervention failed to remedy his ills, it hurt even more (for him and for us). We sorely miss him. We are reminded of how blessed we were to have him as a part of our family. I’m sure others of you feel the same way about your beloved pets.

Animals may not be spiritual beings in the same way we are, but as Saint Francis observed, they are “manifestations of an unforced, innate spiritual presence.”[3] God shows us aspects of his own character in the world and the creatures he made for us. We appreciate and praise the Lord for all the gifts given to us in the animal kingdom and the natural world.

Bible thoughts to consider:[4]

Praise the Lord! … Praise him, all his host! … Praise the Lord from the earth! … Mountains and all hills, fruit trees and all cedars! Wild animals and all cattle, creeping things and flying birds! … Praise the Lord! – Psalm 148: 1,2,7,10,14
I am God, your God. … Every wild animal of the forest is mine, the cattle on a thousand hills. I know all the birds of the air, and all that moves in the field is mine. – Psalm 50:7,10,11
O Lord, how manifold are your works! In wisdom you have made them all; the earth is full of your creatures. … These all look to you to give them their food in due season; when you give to them, they gather it up; when you open your hand, they are filled with good things. When you hide your face, they are dismayed; when you take away their breath, they die and return to their dust. – Psalm 104:24,27-29
Your steadfast love, O Lord, extends to the heavens, your faithfulness to the clouds. Your righteousness is like the mighty mountains, your judgments are like the great deep; you save humans and animals alike, O Lord. How precious is your steadfast love, O God! – Psalm 36:5-7
Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. And even the hairs of your head are all counted. – Matthew 10:29-30

[1] Augustine Thompson, from Francis of Assisi: A New Biography (2012), quoted in Crisis Magazine, June 4, 2015.

[2] Immanuel Kant, quoted in “Hume and Kant and our Obligation to Non-human Animals,” by Christine Korsgaard, Australian Broadcasting Corporation, November 27, 2018.

[3] John L. Murphy, writing on Blogtrotter, August 12, 2013.

[4] Scripture quotations are from the New Revised Standard Version Bible, copyright © 1989 National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

May

2021

Remembering Mom

Mother’s Day 2021

A year ago, at the beginning of May, I was talking with my mother by phone. Shelter-in-place conditions had been in effect for over a month at that time, due to the spread of a new, dangerous coronavirus. My mother was frustrated by pandemic precautions. The beautician couldn’t come into her assisted living center, and she really wanted to get her hair done. She couldn’t gather in the dining room with friends. Social distancing meant they had to stay in their own rooms.

Less than a week later, I was talking to a doctor at the hospital where my mother had been admitted. She had developed symptoms associated with COVID-19. Within a few days, the disease ravaged her circulatory system and took her out of this life. She passed away on Mother’s Day 2020. One day, being unable to sit in a salon seemed an important issue. A short time later, there were far more critical concerns.

My family’s story is not unique. Worldwide, over three million deaths have been attributed to COVID-19. In the United States alone, the number is nearing 600,000.

We’ve learned again what has always been true, what prophets and poets have said from long ago:

“All people are grass, their constancy is like the flower of the field. The grass withers, the flower fades” (Isaiah 40:6,7).
“Our years come to an end like a sigh. The days of our life are seventy years, or perhaps eighty, if we are strong; even then their span is only toil and trouble; they are soon gone, and we fly away” (Psalm 90:9,10).

Life in this world isn’t easy. We’d like it to be smoother than it is. We wish we could predict and prevent problems, but we can’t. Life’s fragility gives us all the more reason to lean on each other and stand with one another. We need each other in good times and bad.

The pandemic of this past year has taught us to value one another more deeply, to treasure times we do have together with family, with friends, with those we care about. As we celebrate Mother’s Day this weekend, many are missing their mothers and grandmothers. Families may be appreciating one another more than ever this year. Others may be feeling family strain from all the difficulties the past year has brought about. In any case, words of wisdom call us to care for one another. “Listen to your father who begot you, and do not despise your mother when she is old. … Let your father and mother be glad; let her who bore you rejoice” (Proverbs. 23:22,25).

Time is short. Relationships are precious. Today we remember those we’ve lost, who have gone on to eternity ahead of us. And today and tomorrow and for as many days as we have, we will nurture and tend to the ties that bind us to those we love. Love is more than sentimentality expressed through cards and flowers on special days. Love is a bond. Even when separated from family by many miles or many months since last seeing each other, the bond still calls us to hold onto each other and share our hearts.

Blessings to your family this Mother’s Day.

—-

Blest be the tie that binds our hearts in Christian love ...

We share our mutual woes, our mutual burdens bear,

and often for each other flows the sympathizing tear.

When we are called to part, it gives us inward pain;

but we shall still be joined in heart, and hope to meet again.

“Blest Be the Tie that Binds,” John Fawcett, 1782

—

Jan

2020

Precious Lord, Take My Hand

Originally published on The Electric Gospel on March 30, 2017, from a chapel message delivered on a college campus.

Precious Lord, Take My Hand

by David Sellnow

Thomas Dorsey’s father was a preacher and a sharecropper. His mother was a church organist. Already from the time he was a boy, Thomas wanted a career in music. At age eleven, he left school to take a job in a local vaudeville theater in Atlanta, Georgia – where the family was living. From ages twelve to fourteen he was earning a living playing piano in bars and brothels and for house parties. By the time he was seventeen, he headed to Chicago to pursue his music further. After working for a time in a steel mill in Gary, Indiana, Dorsey studied music at the Chicago School of Composing and Arranging. He found success in the music business in Chicago as a composer and arranger and piano player. He was known as “The Whispering Piano Player” from playing after-hours parties where the music had to be kept quiet enough so as not to attract the attention of the police.

Dorsey was so frantically engaged in his musical life that at age 21, he suffered a nervous breakdown. He went back home to Atlanta to recuperate. His mother wanted him to stop playing the blues; he should “serve the Lord,” she said. He didn’t listen. He went back to Chicago. Coming to be known as “Georgia Tom,” he amassed even greater musical success as a sought-after band leader or accompanist for blues performers such as Ma Rainey, Tampa Red Whittaker, Scrapper Blackwell, Big Bill Broonzy, Frankie Jaxson, Blind Lemon Jefferson, Memphis Minnie, and Victoria Spivey.

In 1925, Dorsey married his sweetheart, Nettie Harper, who was Ma Rainey’s wardrobe manager. But Dorsey continued to struggle with depression and mental stress and suffered a second major breakdown in 1926. He was suicidal and unable to compose or perform music. Doctors didn’t seem to help. Taking time off didn’t fix things. His sister-in-law urged him to come to church, and he did. He even visited a faith-healer, who told him, “Brother Dorsey, there is no reason for you to be looking so poorly and feeling so badly. The Lord has too much work for you to let you die.” From then on, Dorsey began to do what his mother had always wanted – write and play music for the Lord. He saw connections between the blues and gospel music. He once said, “If a woman has lost a man, a man has lost a woman, his feeling reacts to the blues; he feels like expressing it. The same thing acts for a gospel song. Now you’re not singing the blues; you’re singing gospel, good news song, singing about the Creator. But it’s the same feeling, a grasping of the heart.”

But most churches didn’t want his music. From 1928-1931, as Dorsey tried to sell his gospel music to churches, he was rebuffed. The churches didn’t like how he infused sacred music with blues and jazz. His music didn’t align with the conservative culture preachers were trying to promote. Dorsey had to return to composing and playing the blues in order to make a living. But he kept working on his gospel-based music at the same time.

In August, 1932, Thomas Dorsey had gone to St. Louis where he was to be the featured soloist at a large church revival meeting. His wife was in the last month of pregnancy with their first child. While he was in St. Louis, he received a telegram. Nettie had gone into labor and had died in childbirth … and the baby died too. The man was overcome with grief. It took many days before he could to pull himself together at all. When he did, it was by playing piano. And at the piano, about a month later, in the midst of all that grief, he wrote the most famous song of his musical career: “Precious Lord, Take My Hand.” In the years to come, Dorsey continued writing songs for the church and influencing church music. Writer of around 800 songs in his career, he became known as the father of gospel music in America.

The circumstances of our lives don’t always go in the direction we envision. We have hopes. We have dreams. We have plans and ambitions. And then things don’t go as we plan. Life takes turns in directions we didn’t expect. Sometimes everything comes crashing down around us. Our lives collapse in on top of us. Problems pile up to where we can’t see past them. We find ourselves shaken, confused, wondering what happened, wondering where was God. We so often don’t see what God plans to do for us and with us as he shepherds us through the valley of the shadow of death or whatever turmoil he lets us go through. What we do know is that God intends always what is good for us, that in all things he is working for our good – for our eternal good, in line with his eternal purposes (cf. Romans 8:28). God never abandons those whom he has called as his children. Our precious Lord is always working to bring us home to himself, bring us back to his promises, to anchor us in the love and hope that are never in doubt – in the Messiah, in the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Thomas Dorsey wanted a career in popular music. The Lord chastened him severely, and turned him toward a deepness of faith and toward writing songs that convey the comfort of the gospel – songs that have greatly benefited Christ’s church.

There’s a similar sort of story in the Bible – the story of Joseph. When he was 17, in the fabulous dreamcoat that he’d received from his father, Joseph had fabulous dreams about his future. People would be bowing down to him. He was going to be somebody! It all sounded so amazing and exciting. Little did Joseph know then what his future actually would hold. His brothers abused and mistreated him. They dumped him in a pit and then sold him off like they would a cow or a donkey. He served as a slave. He was accused of a crime he didn’t commit. He languished away in prison. Ultimately, he did end up in a position of power and authority – but only after the Lord had worked hard on his heart and soul through deeply painful experiences in his life.

In the end, when Joseph’s brothers found themselves in a desperate position—coming to Egypt for food because Egypt was the only place that had food—Joseph tested them to see that God had been working on their hearts and souls too. They didn’t recognize him after all those years and in his Egyptian appearance. When Joseph revealed to them who he was, he made it clear he held no grudges against them. He saw how God had guided the path of all their lives up to that point, and trusted that God would be the hope of their people (and all people) for the future.

Today’s Bible reading is Genesis 50:15-21 – from the years in Egypt after Joseph had revealed himself to his brothers and the whole clan of Israel had moved down to Egypt.

When Joseph’s brothers saw that their father was dead, they said, “What if Joseph holds a grudge against us and pays us back for all the wrongs we did to him?” So they sent word to Joseph, saying, “Your father left these instructions before he died: ‘This is what you are to say to Joseph: I ask you to forgive your brothers the sins and the wrongs they committed in treating you so badly.’ Now please forgive the sins of the servants of the God of your father.” When their message came to him, Joseph wept.

His brothers then came and threw themselves down before him. “We are your slaves,” they said.

But Joseph said to them, “Don’t be afraid. Am I in the place of God? You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. So then, don’t be afraid. I will provide for you and your children.” And he reassured them and spoke kindly to them.

Prayer:
Heavenly Father, teach us to trust you through the whole course of our lives – not only when things are going well or in ways we hoped or planned, but also when life is a struggle, when things go horribly wrong, when tragedies strike us. You hold us in your hand. You guide us by your Spirit through your Word. Keep us in your care, and help us to confess that whatever happens, you will be working in all things to bring about good for us as your children – with the ultimate good being that we join you in life eternal. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Dec

2019

Not dead, but sleeping

Originally published on the Electric Gospel on May 27, 2019.

On this Memorial Day, I think back to the funeral of a military officer a number of years ago. I’ve adapted words that I shared on that day for the benefit of other families who have lost a loved one in military service.

This is for God’s glory

by David Sellnow

Jesus had a very dear friend named Lazarus. Lazarus’ sisters, Mary and Martha, also were very dear to Jesus. They lived in Bethany, a short distance outside Jerusalem. Jesus had been a guest in their home. They were followers of his. They believed his teachings and knew of his miracles. They relied on him as their Savior. So it was natural for them, when they had a problem, to turn to Jesus for help.

Lazarus had become ill. His sisters immediately sent word to Jesus. “Lord, behold, he for whom you have great affection is sick” (John 11:3). They assumed Jesus would come quickly; they knew Jesus could heal their brother.

However, when Jesus heard that Lazarus was sick, “he stayed two days in the place where he was” (John 11:6). In the meantime, Lazarus died. By the time Jesus came to Bethany, Lazarus had been in the grave already for a couple of days. Martha went out to meet him and said, “Lord, if you would have been here, my brother wouldn’t have died” (John 11:21).

Think of the pain and bewilderment that Lazarus’ sisters felt: “Jesus, you knew and loved this man; he knew and loved you. We told you he was sick. We called for you to come because we were in trouble. Yet you let him die. You dawdled for two days while he was breathing his last. Why, Lord, why? How could you do this? Why didn’t you help? You had the power to stop this, and instead you let our brother die! Why? Why?”

Dear families of those who have given their lives in the service of our country: You’ve ve likely asked yourselves similar questions concerning the loss of a loved one. “Why, Lord, why?” Such questions are never easily answered. But when we face a tragic and untimely death, the loss of someone who is beloved of Christ, the words and actions of Christ when Lazarus died give us some insight. There are three key things Jesus said and did at that time. When he first heard that Lazarus was sick, Jesus had said, “This sickness is not to death, but for the glory of God, that God’s Son may be glorified by it” (John 11:4). Then, speaking to his disciples about Lazarus’ death, Jesus said, “Our friend, Lazarus, has fallen asleep, but I am going so that I may awake him out of sleep” (John 11:11). To Martha, Jesus also gave an absolute promise: “Your brother will rise again. … I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will still live, even if he dies” (John 11:23,25). Finally, to prove his words, Jesus came to Lazarus’ tomb, had the stone rolled away, and called in a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out!” (John 11:43) – and the dead man came out of his grave, once again alive.

What Jesus did for Lazarus is not fiction. It is not fairy tale. It is fact. What Jesus did for Lazarus he will do for each of his people who fall asleep in him. Yes, he calls it “falling asleep.” Several times Jesus used that expression to refer to people who died. Sometimes he was laughed at for speaking that way. Once, at a wake where mourners were wailing over the death of a young girl, Jesus said, “Why do you make an uproar and weep? The child is not dead, but is asleep” (Mark 5:39). The mourners laughed and ridiculed him. But for Jesus, waking someone from death is no more difficult than waking someone from sleep. Death is not the end. It is a temporary state from which God, by his mighty power, will raise us up again. He will reconstruct each person, whether buried in the ground or scattered on the seas or blown apart in battle. The limits of our human mind may object to such a thought, but it us God’s truth. He guarantees it. And he has the authority and ability to do it. He did it for Lazarus, whom he dearly loved. He will do so for your loved ones too. He will raise each of us from our graves. We wait for the coming of the Last Day, when God’s promise to resurrect every one of us in Christ will be fulfilled.

The part of any death that’s hardest for us to understand is how such a thing could be for God’s glory. In Lazarus’ case, God’s purpose was seen rather quickly, within a few days. Jesus had said that Lazarus’ sickness would not end in death, and that God would be glorified. And so it was. The sickness brought about death, but the story didn’t end there. Death was reversed. The miracle was witnessed by many. The Son of God, Jesus, revealed his grace and power. The reputation of Jesus’ name grew, and people put their faith in him more and more.

Where is the glory of God for those whose lives are cut short prematurely today? God’s glory is there, but it is painfully hard for us to see. Those loved by the Lord live on in the eternal light of the Savior. But at present, all we see is the emptiness that is left behind. We grieve. We feel their absence. And that hurts. For the families of lost service members, when they died, you died too. You died on the inside. And you didn’t get to wake up looking into the loving eyes of your Lord in heaven, as your departed loved one did. God has asked you to stay behind in this world, now especially bleak for you without your beloved in it. But the glory of God still will be revealed in this. God, who has crushed your spirit, will strengthen and support you and revive you again. He will uplift your soul. You will never be the same; your lives will be changed. But God will give you reasons to hope and will work to draw you closer to him than you’ve been before. His purpose in life, in death, in all things, is to bring each of us nearer to him in faith. He has a plan, even when horrible tragedy strikes, to bring about blessing for each of his children. Bu remember–he counts blessings in spiritual, not material terms. What matters most to God is increasing and deepening your reliance on him, so that your hearts will be ready on the day he chooses to call you home to himself, to go and be with him, where your loved one now has gone.

You dear family members who are remembering lost loved ones, I know you know these things. I know that your faith in your Savior is still alive and breathing. Nevertheless, even as you hang onto hope in Jesus, you still will mourn. And no one can fully know how you feel. Friends and acquaintances will have a sense of your loss, but few can relate to the depth of loss you’ve experienced. And you yourselves have never felt heartache as severe as this. But keep the faith and take courage in this: There is someone who has experienced the loss of his One and Only Son. The Father in heaven watched his own Son, Jesus, die a bloody, heart-wrenching, horrible death, nailed to a cross in agony. It was a death so devastating that the sun stopped shining when it happened. But it was not a death without purpose. Jesus’ death was for our ultimate and eternal good. By his death, Christ became our Redeemer from death. He has taken our lost loved ones on angels’ wings to be with him. And God will fully, miraculously restore the bodies of all his people in glory. We have hope in a Savior who will do these things for us and a Father who understands the pain we feel. We believe that God is glorious and great and good, and that the only reason he allows death to occur to us is as a way to usher us into the glory and greatness and goodness of heaven. That is where those who have died in the Lord have gone. By faith, that is where we will follow also.

Dear God, make it so.

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